Aero Stuart 6.15.2010

Here's a video montage I made, of the last two years we've been graced with the life of Aero Stuart. Happy Birthday, sweet boy!

Aero turns 2

Technically, he turns two tomorrow.  But I can already foresee tomorrow being full of things to do to prepare for our celebration of him.  Right now I have some down time to reflect back on these past two years... And so I will try really hard to not tear up as I ponder.   But I will not succeed  :0)

Aero Stuart is a dynamic little boy.  Full of energy.  Life.  Affection.  Shrill squeals (we are trying to work on that).   Lover of balls.  Lover of hats.  Lover of the outdoors.  He is free-spirited, adventurous. Independent.  Playful.

Yet Aero will lovingly stroke my hair when I take time to straighten it- he actually notices when it looks pretty.  But then I have to comb out the peanut butter and banana bits ;0)  He took 5 whole minutes today to give me full, hard hugs around the neck, and kisses on the lips.  He melts my heart.

To this day, he still is evidence of a God who loves me, who hears my prayers and sees my tears.  Our third child was a long time in coming.  Longer than we wanted.  A more painful journey than I would have chosen.  The heavens seemed closed and silent.  No answers.  Just hopes and longing.  I came to a place of deciding to choose to trust God, even if I never got what I wanted.

And then we were given this precious little boy, so full of spunk and tenderness.  What a dynamic mix. I adore every feature of his perfect face.  His perfect kissable lips and his beautiful olive eyes.  His contagious smile and laugh.  He is just what this family needed.

I am so, so very grateful.  What a wonderful two years it has been.

Happy Birthday, Aero Stuart!!!

That Mom

So I found myself as "that mom" at Target last week.  You know.  That mom with the shrill, piercing shrieks of a red puffy faced, runny nosed, two year old.   You are probably cringing inside as you read that.  We all know what an uncomfortable atmosphere that sort of experience creates.  Why was this two year old shrieking?  Because he broke a bone or was bleeding profusely from a major cut?  Because the world was about to end?  Well, no, no, and no.  It was because he didn't want to sit in the cart.  I know.  How can a mom be so cruel, right?

Funny how everyone avoided my eyes as I steered the cart up and down the aisles.  Normally people don't at all mind looking me in the face.  Not today.  I was actually humored by it (don't tell).

And what did I do to attend to my two year old's behavior?  Did I address his attitude?  Take him into the bathroom and administer some discipline?  Nope.  This mommy quickly found isle 8 with "Snacks",  tore open a box of fruit snacks, and gave him a healthy portion of them.   And behold, peace came to earth.

Sometimes moms just want silence.  Sometimes we just want a little bit of peace.  Behavioral issues are almost always addressed in my children.  But this time.... this time, I purchased a bit of peace for $3.50.  It was worth it.

Mom Visits

I think I should rename this blog, "Every Month Delights" instead, with as often as I get back to it :0)  But it doesn't have quite the same ring to it...

My mom was here last week, for a whole week.  I loved having her around!  Who doesn't like to double themselves when there are four children to tend to, and a house load of work on top of that?!  I think the thing I loved most about her visit, was just being able to bless her in lots of small ways.  The fun part is that she is soooo appreciative of every little thing, that she makes it such a joy to think of something else to do together to "make a memory" (a phrase she likes to use).   I hope that I can be that much of both a blessing and a joy to my children when they are grown and in this stage of life.

feeding the fish

Breakfast brunch at Mimi's Cafe (the first time mom and I went, Marcail was only a couple of weeks old in Colorado- now she is almost SIX.)

At the neighborhood park

The Air and Space Museum

Tea time!

Doing Marcail's hair- she liked to do this almost every day she was here.

On top of these things, we did several StarBucks runs (there are NO Starbucks in the town she lives in!), we took a relaxing drive into the countryside, and did movie nights complete with fine chocolates and wine.  She also sent Andrew and I off twice for date nights!  Woohoo!  

Significance

I always love catching up with old friends.   Isn't it so refreshing to reconnect with a kindred spirit and talk about life as of late?

 Except when I get that awkward feeling as I realize I really don't have that much to elaborate on.

 "Yeah, I changed poopy diapers 6 times today, can you believe it?  Six times!   And today I made breakfast.  And lunch.  And dinner.  Actually I did that yesterday.  And the day before that.  And the day before that.  Isn't that interesting?!  Today was laundry day.   Yep.  It sure was.  Tomorrow I need to go grocery shopping.  We totally used up THREE gallons of milk in 3 days!!!  Crazy!!!  Uh- huh.".

 Am I the only one who can't wait for the other person to talk because there isn't anything too jaw dropping about my life?   Doesn't it come down to thinking its all rather insignificant at times?   Not really all that flashy and suave?

 This isn't about touting the heroics of being a mom.  Most likely whatever anyone does, they sorta get dulled out with it at some point.  At some point the excitement wears off and it just becomes day to day, whatever it is.  I sat down one day when I was in such a mood, and thought to myself, "If I wasn't doing this, what exactly would I want to do?" And I thought.  And I thought.  And I pondered some more.  Do you know what?  No matter what profession I imagined for myself, I knew that I would still want to be a mommy, spending my days with my children.  It was an inspiring moment as I realized how beautiful my life really is.  I am doing exactly what I would really want to be doing.

  For me, it can be easy to view my current role as not very significant.   I think that comes with the "job environment."  It's not as though after addressing my child's behavior, do I get a "Thanks, mom!!! I know that you addressing this now is going to impact me in a huge way in the future- thanks for nipping that in the bud!"  Or, after running to the store at 11 o'clock at night, the night before Easter, to pick up Easter treats - because our Easter plans with extended family got completely nixed because one of my kids just got sick and the rest of my kids have been so excited to celebrate Easter, so I've got to do something for them, but all the stores are basically wiped clean of Easter stuff so I have to go to 3 separate stores (yes, that run-on sentence was as crazy as it felt) - am I going to get any sort of recognition from them.   They were fast asleep in their cozy beds, absolutely oblivious to my desperate treasure hunt.  As they should have been.

 I'm just saying that my significance CAN'T come from them.  They are incapable of recognizing any of that.   Yet : )  And as much as my husband and other meaningful people in my life tell me what a good job I am doing, that void of significance can't possibly be filled by those warm fuzziness all the time.   This girl is like a bottomless pit, actually, when it comes to that sort of stuff.   But the more I talk with people, the more I see how common that is (so I'm not all that weird, whew!).

  I find that sometimes I can be busily but contentedly preparing dinner for my little family, and can truly feel God's pleasure over me as I do that.   I know that may sound so strange.   But I can honestly sense His joy and delight in me happily caring for the gifts of my family He has given me.  It is in those moments, and in clinging to the truths from that, that I find I feel truly significant.  He sees me.  He delights in me.   He knows my efforts.   He knows the struggles.   He sees my heart.  And me happily chopping up this and that to go into our soup for supper at night is significant enough for Him : ).

That just makes me smile!

Free at Last

After 2+ weeks of sick kids, I was finally able to get OUT of the house today with the kids and hit the gym!  For me, working out is one of the best mind detoxifying things I can do.  Well, that, and a long walk alone outside, or an hour long massage (but you can imagine how un-often either of those things happen!)  Our gym here is literally 3 minutes away, and the kids really enjoy playing at the Kids Club there.  So off we went!

Fortunately, the stomach bug that went around here was rather friendly, and we had a few dates in-between our kids playing tag with it, that it wasn't an awful ordeal.  But it did keep us from going anywhere other than outside.  So I am glad it is over, and we can resume getting back to a social life!

Spring arrived so warmly here that I assumed it was just going to get warmer from then on out... Silly me!  Who else is ready for warm park weather to arrive and stay for awhile?  I certainly am!

Now Rapunzel is free from her 4 story tower, er, town home : )

Here are a few pics of us being cooped up:

 Playing tent on a sick day

 Outside on one of the few warm days we had

 Playing outside on a cold, chilly day! (this lasted for about 15 minutes.  The kids were totally fine, but mommy was the wimp and said, "This is way too cold! Inside!"

 Aero 

 Movie time. Yes.

 Printed Paper Dolls!  Cheap, easy, and fun!

 Marcail cut these out on her own!

Thought you might appreciate a close-up of our freshly painted feet : )

These Days

It's another late night, and I have just finished putting all the kids to bed.  Does anyone else do this count-down? : "1 down, 3 to go!  2 down, 2 to go! 4 down, ALL DONE!!!"  I sure do!  Whew! : )  And if at no other point in the day do I feel like I've accomplished something, when all the kids are sleeping and the house is quiet, it's then that I feel like SuperWoman : )

Andrew's work schedule has been a grueling adjustment for us.  Mostly it's just a big adjustment of how to spend time together, of how to maximize that time.  It is normal for 2-4 days out of the week for him to leave in the morning and I'll see him long after the kids are in bed.  So when he is home, it feels like party time!  : )

I want to be very cautious here, that this doesn't come out like a drawn out complaint, because I don't really think that way.  Yes, sometimes the days get really long with his schedule being as it is, but I am so pleased that God has been faithful to us.  This job that Andrew has now- it is pretty much everything that he has been wanting.  He wants a work enviroment where he is stretched, where he is invested in, where he is surrounded by people with whom he shares similar interests and a place that has a vision that he can run with.  And this is it.  Not only did he end up doing what he really wanted to do, but God provided this pretty much the instant he was informed of his employment downsizing.  It was just remarkable.

We knew that taking this job would be a stretch for us.  For him AND for me.  And it certainly has been.  There have been moments, today even, in the midst of the chaos, neediness, and noise that comes with 4 children at home, where I just think to myself, "Put a fork in me! I am DONE!"  And yet I've pulled through somehow (after an earnest prayer and some hidden tears).

I'm not sure yet of what God wants to accomplish in us moving to Virginia, but I know that He wants us here.  So regardless of the stretch, I'm all in.

Anyway, back to maximizing family time- its very much a work in progress!  On the times that Andrew does have with us, I wrestle with the best way to spend it.  See, there are several options.  Do I :(a) Put aside all the housework and play with Andrew and the kids - which means that I will have to do it all later, after the kids are in bed, which would cut into MY time with Andrew; (b) Get the housework done while Andrew and the kids are enjoying each other, that way Andrew and I could have some time together later - which means that the kids won't have a "full" experience of family time; or (c) Have Andrew help me with some of the housework that way we can get family time AND alone time in - but which means that on his time off he is still working around the house. Hmmmmm.  Am I missing a better option?  Ideally, I could get everything done while he works, that way we can play when we are all together.... but...... I have not achieved that level of amazing yet!!!

Marcail and Me being silly : )

That is probably my biggest struggle now.  And out of all the major issues in the world, I know it is very, very minor.  And I am very, very blessed.   Speaking of blessed, Andrew just walked in the door : )  So I'm gonna wrap this up and call it a night!  Leave your thoughts, please!  I have this app on the blog that lets me see that I have WAY more visitors than I have comments ; )

Returning!

There's so much to update on, but this will have to be a quick post; I have four children running around in my living room.  Well, one is confined to his walker, but he makes enough noise for the rest of them : )

We DID have our 4th baby, and I am not 70 wks pregnant like the baby app on this suggests : )  Note to self: take that app off!  : )  His name is Logan David, and he has a gorgeous set of bright blue eyes, and is currently 7 months old already.

We MOVED (again) to the DC area.  In a little but quickly growing city called Gainesville, in beautiful Virginia.  I had no idea that it would be so beautiful up here!  Green, green, green rolling hills, a splash of mountains, thick lush trees, hundreds of acres of pasture land and cows and horses.  It really is just gorgeous.

Andrew had gotten laid off at his job in Franklin, and the whole story of how God provided and directed us here so quickly and clearly was something I will always cherish in my heart.  I'm not sure of why He loves us so much to be involved so directly in our circumstance, but it is beautiful to me.  I am even now still seeing His hand providing and taking care of us.  Do you know how comforting that is?

Marcail and Donovan are enrolled in the local elementary school for next school year - there are some moments when my heart squeezes with pain when I think about how much I'm going to miss having them around me all the time.  And other times, I feel so thankful that they will have the chance to take their energy somewhere else than my dining room set : )   We'll take it a year at a time and see how that schooling environment works for them.  It is so nice to have options!

That is all I can squeeze in for now : )  It's getting rather loud and rambunctious in here....

I Can Relate!

I should preface this by saying that I don't always feel like this when I'm pregnant,.... but.... there are days!

When I saw this, I couldn't help but giggle- I've seen that lost and helpless look in Andrew's eyes before!

I've told him before that half the time I don't understand myself, so I certainly don't expect him to.

Hope you enjoy this as much as I did!

Fun Factory

One of the kids' favorite places here is the Fun Factory! It is full of arcade games (a lot of them for the older ages), a bowling alley, bumper cars, mini-golf, and little rides. Because they are still so little, we mostly just stick to the air hockey table, little rides, and the simplest arcade games - most of the time they still get enough tickets to each trade them in at the end collect a little prize. They like that part : ) This time Aero was old enough to try out the rides, instead of being strapped in his stroller the whole time. He was a happy boy the whole time!

One of these days, Andrew and I will do a date night here and try out some of the things actually geared for people our age : )

The Welcome Signs of Summer...

Summer has arrived in full swing! We are embracing it with open and glad arms!

I love the fresh aromas of earth and greenery, flowers in bloom, warm mulch, fresh cut grass, sunscreen, and yummy eateries on the grill.

My skin relishes the warmth of the sun on my skin, and my ears drink in the music of everything living, growing, and buzzing about.

These are some of my favorite things, to give you a taste of this idyllic life : )

Aero swinging in the park

Marcail and Donovan swinging in the park : )

The magnolias on our tree in the front yard are in bloom! They smell lovely!

....along with some other flowering bushes....

Grilling out on the patio on a warm summer's evening

-while the children play outside-

Sometimes I have to stop and take a moment, to view the life I live with a heart full of gratitude and contentment. It really is such a beautiful world and a wonderful life!

Introducing...

We have decided on a name for our baby boy!

Logan David.

Andrew and I have always liked the name "Logan" (Aero actually came within an inch of being named Logan). We've been using family names for our children's middle names, so we chose "David" after Andrew's dad, who is a wonderful man - I could go on and on about how much he means to us, but I would probably embarrass him : ) Suffice it to say that I consider it an honor to know and love him. He certainly deserves a namesake : )

We all feel very settled knowing that this little guy finally has a name! He is 23 weeks along now, and I am starting to feel very consistent active bumps and tumblings coming from inside; for me it is a very comforting feeling- now, I did not say comfortable! : ) It is comforting to know that little Logan is lively and healthy and strong. It puts my mind at peace.

...And Another One Makes Four

We are 21 weeks pregnant with our fourth child. Our fourth. Whew. I try to wrap my mind around the truth of it, and my brain won't let me think about it too long - like it wants to go into shut-down mode. I am sure once our new baby is here, all the details will resolve themselves and I will find that I can manage four children after all! Which is why I can't let myself stress about it before-hand; that would require extra energy that I just don't have right now : )

Finding out we were pregnant again (Aero will be 15 months when his baby brother arrives), was quite a shock for me! We knew we wanted a fourth, but I was still trying to not feel overwhelmed with 3 when we discovered we had another on the way. We had even been "preventing" and still we'd managed to unknowingly create a new life. This will be 4 children, 5 years old and younger.

I remember in the frustrating and painful days of my miscarriages when it was so difficult for me to listen to women who were pregnant and didn't really care to be (for one reason or another). It was difficult for me to not be angry with the injustice of it all. I remember thinking that I would always rejoice in a new life and never be ungrateful about it like those mothers. And here I am, a few years later, discovering what a harsh judgement that was. Because I found that I was also one of those mothers.

A mystery in my life is why it was so difficult to have another child when we desperately wanted one, and then why we easily made another child when we weren't pursuing it? How does this make sense? I do know that both situations, as opposite as they are from each other, have brought me to my knees. During my miscarriages, I found myself pleading with the Lord for His grace, for His strength, to be able to trust Him regardless of the situation. Then during this pregnancy, I have found myself praying the same thing! There is something very humbling in knowing that in my own strength, I am not adequate for the task. But with Him, I am able. Only with Him.

I know that when this child enters our family, I will see, just as I've seen with the other 3, that of course he is a perfect addition, a perfect fit, and our family would have been incomplete without him. I am already grateful that the Lord's plans are better than our own!

Now to figure out his name.... Any suggestions???

Appendicitis- A Dose of Adventure on the Side (pun intended)

I am sitting in the hospital room, while Andrew groggily keeps nodding off to sleep. He just got out of surgery - his appendix was removed this morning, after 1.5 weeks of abdominal pain. After he got off of work last night, in yet more pain, we discussed what he should do. He had done enough research to begin thinking that appendicitis was the culprit. My thoughts were that if it was the reason for the pain, we shouldn't mess with waiting it out for him to die from it! I know, genius thinking, right? :)

Off he went to the ER, while I stayed at home with the sleeping children, cell phone close at hand. When the results finally came back that appendicitis was indeed the cause, we were both relieved. Andrew said he couldn't think of anything worse than the doctors coming back and saying, "Everything looks good, we don't know what is causing your pain- go on home." Although we both had to spend a lonely and sleepless night apart, neither of us were nervous or anxious; mostly just eager to finish this out!

Results have just come back from the surgery: the doctor was very surprised that the appendix had not yet ruptured - he said it was extremely swollen, inflamed, and surrounded by puss. Right now I feel loved by the Lord that He was protecting Andrew all along, even when we had no clue it was so serious.

I have to say, I've REALLY appreciated the use of Facebook during this time! It becomes so easy to keep everyone updated, and therefore I've been flooded with offers to help, pray, or both. And I've kept thinking that it is such a luxury to be around family during this time- they have been so eager to take the children, which is the biggest relief for me! Although the children know that daddy is in the hospital because he wasn't feeling well, they seem to be excited to get away and play somewhere new!

Breath of Fresh Air

Aero turns 11 months in 4 days. Which means he turns 1 next month. And I can hardly believe that a child can grow up so quickly.

When he was born, he had to wear oxygen for the first 3 months of his life; which I found a little ironic since his name means "air" in English (it's also a European spelling of "Aaron"). He looked like such a fragile little thing. Very cute. Extremely cute. But fragile. Today I look at him and the oxygen days seem like another life. He is lively, flirty, cuddly, and smiley.

In the times during our 2 miscarriages, I prayed for the Lord's perfect timing for our next little baby. I knew He knew which sperm with which egg would make the perfect addition to our little brood. And it was Aero. I can't explain or pretend to understand if it was supposed to be him all along; but I do know that he is a breath of fresh air in my life. He is perfect for our family.

I've seen such a tender side in Marcail that had not had reason to come out before; she adores her baby brother, and is protective, caring, watchful, and adoring. Donovan has gone through a little adjustment in handing over the "baby of the family" role, but most of the time, he is just eager to do boy things with his brother already. I have to explain to him that Aero isn't big enough to wrestle with yet, though I appreciate the sentiment. The nice thing is that Aero is good-natured and also appreciates the sentiment : )

Aero will squeal and I will hear the pitter-patter of little hands and knees crawling on our wood floors as he races as fast as he can go, to keep up with his siblings. He is already so eager to be one of them, to be in the middle of their games and play.

But mostly, I just know that for me personally, he brightens my life. I look at him and see answered prayers. I see a gift from Heaven, longed for and sought for, and finally delivered; and upon delivery, finding the gift above and beyond what I could have imagined.